Embracing Your Mother-In-Law

I consider myself fortunate to have such a loving and supportive mother-in-law.  But others may not be so lucky.  If there is conflict with your mother-in-law, chances are the issues will trickle over into your engagement or marriage. For the sake of your relationship, it may be up to you to 'be the bigger person' and try to keep the peace.  It may not be easy but it will be worth it.  

When mothers have a very close relationship with their child, they may feel resentment to the person that their child wants to marry, feeling like their child is being 'taken away' from them.  This attitude can turn them into a Monster-In-Law, and they may not like you right away no matter how hard you try.  Do your best not to make your partner have to choose. 

Here's a tip: Consider including your mother-in-law in your bridal shower and wedding planning process. Specify a task for her to make her feel involved. After all, it's her son/daughter's special day too.

True, it's possible that you may never be best friends with your mother-in-law, but it is important to at least be on good terms with her. When you feel the need to correct or address something with her, try starting the conversation with something positive and then give her a chance to explain her behavior. Be honest with her letting her know that this shouldn't be a rivalry and you care for her and want to get along.  You both love her son/daughter and will do anything to make them happy.  

Here's another tip: Until you bury the hurt of the past, you and your mother-in-law will not be able to move on.  So exercise forgiveness.  

Last tip: Do not include your mother-in-law in your relationship or marital disputes.  What you say can and will be used against you at a later date.  Seek advice from a Pastor, marriage counselor or another happily married friend instead.

Your goal is to have a healthy relationship with your mother-in-law which is part of having a strong family.  Be patient and be stay committed to the goal. Communication is key, so talk to your partner. Best of luck!
#behappy

~Your Favorite Wedding Officiant~
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